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My
old friend Sheena was back in town last weekend and few of us couple-y
types went out to dinner to catch up and to see Sheena's brand new
little baby. And, as I should have known, it
was all a big set-up. Scam. Plot. Ploy. Con. Whatever.
How so? Well, look at who was there:
- Max and Laurie, with their two kids.
- Matt and Jessica, with one of their kids.
- Carey,
with his new baby.
- Sheena and Gary, with their new
baby.
- Beth and Glenn.
Five kids (ranging in age from zero-ish to
three), seven parents--and the two of us. For those of you keeping score
at home, that's a 6-to-1 ratio of kids and parents to childless losers
(in a way, we were fortunate that Regular Blog Readers rat bastard, JJ, me,
and the Barney weren't there because they have an astounding nine
kids between them). And the
worst part is I didn't even see it coming. Hey, come to dinner so we
can show you what fabulous kids we have and what you're missing out on.
Don't get me wrong here, though. I certainly
like kids and I like all of my friends' kids and I enjoyed the dinner,
but my stable of Baby Conversation Topics has only a few horses in it. Although I did get to try out my new response to the
never-ending questions of when we were going to have kids ("Us having
kids? We've never thought about it."), it seemed a little forced. By the time the
desserts rolled around, I was pretty much reduced to silently making googly eyes at Matt's kid and wondering how I could squeeze out of the
booth past 53 strollers to go have a smoke outside. Pathetic.
Pressure? Nah...Okay, maybe a little...Okay,
maybe a lot.
But I felt a lot better about myself when we
all went back to Matt's house and I asserted my kid-less powers by
carelessly downing a 12-pack of Corona and being the very last to leave
at the end of the night.
Ha! Take that, all of you mature responsible
non-sleeping parent people!
Pathetic. |
2000-2007