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| Thursday
June 3 2004. |
GO-WITH.
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During
my bi-monthly grocery shopping trip yesterday, I bought a small jar of
capers. I had always wanted to get a jar, but I never seemed to
remember.
But now that I have them, I'm not exactly sure what to do with them. What do they go with? Fish? Red meat? In sauces?
And now that I think about it, I don't even know if I like capers...
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HEN SEX.
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THE WRIST.
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BI-MONTHLY.
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Headline
Of The Day (or maybe of the week...or even of the month):
"Man Commits Suicide After Having Sex With Hen"
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How bad am I
doing in fantasy baseball? Well, just hours after I had traded for Eric
Chavez, the dumbass breaks his wrist.
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Speaking
of bi-monthly, I'd like to publicly admit that Barney was right and I
was wrong. He claimed that "bi-monthly" meant twice per month,
while I insisted that it could mean every two weeks. Well, "bi-weekly"
means every two weeks. He was right. I was wrong. There ya go.
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TOMORROW'S DINNER.
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HUNGER STRIKE.
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Grilled
Tuna Steak with Lemon-Caper Butter
8 tablespoons unsalted butter -- softened
3 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1/2 teaspoon grated lemon zest
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
2 teaspoons capers -- drained
6 8-oz tuna steaks -- cut 3/4-in thick
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1. Mix together butter, 2 tbsp lemon juice, lemon zest, mustard, and capers. Set aside.
2. Prepare a hot fire. Brush tuna steaks with oil. Drizzle remaining 1 tbsp lemon juice over fish. Place steaks on a oiled grill set 4 to 6 inches from coals. Grill, turning once, until firm and opaque at center, about 10 to 12 minutes.
3. Remove from heat and top each steak with 1 tbsp lemon-caper butter.
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Holy
crap. I was searching for some more recipes with capers and I ran across
a worst recipes ever website. The hands-down winner of the Worst Recipe
Of All Time went to the following recipe (please prepare yourself--I
mean it):
The Placenta Cocktail
1/4 cup raw placenta
8oz V-8 juice
2 ice cubes
1/2 cup carrot.
Blend at high speed for 10 to 15 seconds and serve.
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GOOGLE: "CAPERS."
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Knife-Wielders,
The Wrist, Go-With, Hen Sex, Google: "Capers", What I
Really Meant, Tomorrow's Dinner, Hunger Strike, and Bi-Monthly. |
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KNIFE-WIELDERS.
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WHAT I REALLY MEANT.
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I
had a CVS dream last night. I dreamt that I chased down a shoplifter in
the parking lot of some CVS store somewhere. He had swiped 10 packages
of Kodak 35 mm film and concealed them under his overcoat. When I
reached him, he turned and pulled out a long knife. And then, of course,
I woke up.
The odd thing about the dream (besides the fact I haven't had a
CVS dream since I left the dang company) is that in 17 years at CVS, I
never chased down a shoplifter. My thinking was that a criminal would
pretty much do anything to stay out of jail--including pulling a weapon
and using it.
Maybe the dream was letting me know I was right.
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2000-2004 by gja.
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