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| Friday
October 1 2004. |
FINAL UPDATE.
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| Well,
they're three games out of a playoff spot with three games left to play.
So, in order for them to make the playoffs, the Giants, Cubs, and Astros
all have to lose their last three games. My Padres aren't mathematically
eliminated yet, but they might as well be. Hey, nice season, guys. You
won 20 more games than you did last year. Outstanding.
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TOP FIVE.
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HOLY CRAP!
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It
may not be the King of All Television like Seinfeld was and it certainly isn't one of the
"cool" shows to admit to watching, but I think Everybody Loves Raymond is
one of the funniest damn shows ever on TV. I'd definitely put it in my
personal Top Five (along with Taxi, WKRP, Cheers,
and Seinfeld). The writing is hilarious and the
characters are perfect. And I'm pretty sure that I'll be Frank Barone
when I'm 60.
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Here's
a vote for the Great Indoors: In our drunken stupor last weekend, Bethy
and I decided to sleep in the backyard. We lugged the queen-size
mattress upstairs, flopped it onto the deck, and promptly passed out.
Sure, it was a little chilly, but it was nice to sleep under the stars.
And under other things too, apparently.
When I woke up the next morning, I found that a little
caterpillar had shit on my pillow.
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IVAN.
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PIG WITH SHOES.
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In
five or ten years, after people's memories have faded, I can tell people
that I was in the Outer Banks during Hurricane Ivan.
See?
You've forgotten already that Ivan didn't come anywhere close to the Outer Banks.
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The 3 best lines from Raymond:
1. Marie: "Frank?
He's just a pig with shoes."
2. Retirement Community
Director (talking about Frank): "Then he turned the golf cart and starting aiming it at other
people. And he began yelling, 'Hit the monkey, win a cookie!'"
3. Ray: "Ugh. It smells like a skunk that came out of the ass of another skunk."
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BOOBY.
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Ivan,
Final Update, Stupidity, Pig With Shoes, Top 5, Holy Crap!, Easter At
The Methadone Clinic, Booby, and The Caterpillar. |
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Reverend Jim
(handing out invitations): "Bobby, do you spell your name with one
'o' or two?"
Bobby: "One."
Reverend Jim: "I'll get it right next time, Booby."
(Anyone else think maybe I'm spending just a little too much time
watching TV?)
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EASTER AT THE METHADONE CLINIC .
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STUPIDITY.
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Beth:
"Shouldn't you be doing your death penalty writing for Suite101.com
on weekends or nights since it's not really work?"
Glenn:
"Not really work? Writing articles about the death penalty is the
hardest thing I do."
Beth: "I thought you liked
doing that."
Glenn: "No, not really. It's kind of
like working in a soup kitchen on Thanksgiving. It's tough, depressing,
and unpaid work, but it's important."
Hey, I thought it
was a good analogy...
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When
we were at the beach two weekends ago, I did something pretty stupid: I
smoked. And I don't mean the smoking-while-golfing thing like I normally
do. I mean I smoked. A lot. What an idiot. That was about the
dumbest thing I could have done because now I'm having all sorts of
problems again with cigarettes. Physical and mental. I just gotta stop
altogether. I have to.
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2000-2004 by gja.
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